How Could I Do this to Myself? (for 12 years!)

When my family and I moved into this house, I disliked the mailbox instantly.

It was one of those sturdy and expensive hard plastic mailboxes that remind one of sturdy trash cans. It was all black, and a little tilted to one side. I hated it.

Yet, I kept if for 12 years. Why?

To the left, you can see our old, ugly mailbox. To the right: our new, beautiful mailbox.

As an Act of Self-sabotage, I Suppose.

The mailbox, often being the first thing people find when they first come to your house, represents opportunities and visibility. A tilted mailbox gives you bad feedback.

At the beginning of this year, I finally asked myself. How could I do this to myself? Why have I subjected myself to seeing something I didn’t like every time I came home for 12 years?

I could come up with answers, which were really excuses. It was sturdy, it looked like new, I thought the time would come when it had to be replaced and then I would choose one to my liking – but the thing seemed eternal. Years passed and it stilled looked like new. A few times, when we had contractors in the house, I asked them to try and straighten the post. They tried, but the mailbox went back to being tilted in just a few days, there was no straightening it.

Getting a New Mailbox

As my birthday approached in the spring, I searched online for the mailbox I really wanted. I wanted a mailbox that looked like a dollhouse – one that my inner child would approve of. I found it on etsy.

My husband got it to me for my birthday in May, but, since it was hand and custom made, it took months for it to be finished and shipped to us.

Things Come to Light

When we went to replace the old mailbox we discovered two things:

1) the mailbox post was cracked

2) the mailbox post had never been properly installed

A proper mailbox post is 4 ft tall, with 2 ft buried in the ground. This mailbox was 2.5 ft tall, and only a few inches were under ground held by a block of concrete. That was the reason the mailbox could never be really straightened before: it didn’t have a deep enough base.

Depth is one of the keywords for money, career and abundance and the mailbox is associated with the life area called Career, Life Mission and Individuality.

Installing the New Mailbox

While my older son went on his first date (yes, I did cry), my husband and younger son went to the store to choose a new mailbox post and sleeve. My sons dug up the required 2 ft deep post hole. The 2 of them and I added the concrete, using two levels to make sure the post stayed straight. A couple of days later, when the cement had hardened enough, we added the sleeve and the new mailbox.

See the difference? I could have been enjoying this, or something like this, for the past 12 years. I could have been getting this jolt of happiness I get now every time I drive unto my driveway, instead of the sagging of disappointment I used to have with the old mailbox.

The old, ugly mailbox, was an affront to my inner child.

In addition to the beautiful mailbox, we have beautiful memories of buying and installing it, as a family.

How Are You Self-sabotaging at Home?

How are you self-sabotaging at home? I have seen many clients and students self-sabbotage by cluttering their porch, foyer and hallway. In this way, they block their own path.

Step 6 in the Nine Steps to Feng Shui® System is an exploration of the ways in which you sabotage yourself by your choice of photos, artwork and adornments. Check out the Feng Shui Immersion Program to see how you may work with me long distance.

The mailbox is visibility, and I did this as the launch of my latest book was approaching. My visibility certainly increased. The feedback I got about the book was amazing. Some people have converted to Feng Shui who were completely skeptical before.

It was time to become more visible, and so this was perfect timing to get a new, beautiful, hand made mailbox. One that, to me, screams: “A Feng Shui Consultant lives here!”



How to Get Along with Your Family Members 

To get along with your relatives you first need to understand the Feng Shui Five Elements Personality Types.

Click on the link below to enter your name and email so I can send you the guide to find your personality type and that of your family members, as well as register you for the free webinar on how to get along with them.


  1. That is a beautiful mailbox and group effort! You definitely improved your feng shui, but that doesn’t mean you were sabotaging yourself for a whole twelve years. Your deeper mind was working on it during that time!

  2. Moni,

    But what to do if your husband picked out the ugly mailbox 20+ years ago and really loves his “lego” mailbox, especially how sturdy and practical it is?

    Your new mailbox is beautiful!

    • Thank you, Linda. We love our new mailbox. Have you had a conversation about the mailbox with your husband? He’s had “his way” 20 years. If you really don’t like it, it is important to have that conversation. You don’t have to criticize his choice, just express that you would like something different.

  3. I love this mailbox
    I had a 2 foot high 2 storey dolls house as a child with furniture and people in it – this reminds me of this

    • It’s a much nicer experience to home home to this mailbox. I love that it matches the colors of our home. ???? A few of my students have told me they spent lots of times playing with doll houses when they were children.

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